Now that it's 2012, I'm starting to get nervous for all the events that will unfold. When we heard the confirmation that E has a set date for job re-training (he will leave
SERE and go
TACP), I began to count down the months until he would leave. The few times we would get in an argument I would tell myself,
"He will only be here for X months. Get over yourself and enjoy the time you do have with him." I have 6 more months until he leaves, and then he will be gone for 17 weeks. I know that is nothing compared to a normal deployment (especially an army deployment)
and I know that he is not going to be anywhere dangerous
and I know that we will still be able to talk regularly, but we've never been apart for this long and it freaks me out. I also know that this will prepare for what his real job requires, being gone . I hate admitting all of this because I would like to promise everyone that we will be just fine and we've got it all under control. I know both sets of parents have (valid) concerns and so I feel pressured to stay positive so they won't worry....but I have to be honest with myself. We will be dealing with distance. E will be dealing with a new job. We will be dealing with the transition from Air Force to Army. We will be moving by the end of the year.
Despite all these fears, we have been praying about this for so long. We are at peace that this is the direction where our family should be headed and I stand by our decision 100%. However, I need to start preparing myself more than ever for the long haul. If E and I are going to be dealing with distance, I must make sure I'm rooted in the Word more than ever. We will need God's strength to get through the change. We will need the love and
support, not the questioning, of our families and friends. I'm sure I've opened myself to criticism by many veteran military wives (as they've experienced so much more than I have) but I think we all have one thing in common and that is the desire to have our husbands home.
If you remember, please be praying for us this year.
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Just a random Kaiden moment. He loves playing with the door on our dog cage and I hate it.
I'm so afraid he'll get hurt so I always try to keep it closed. |
He's getting so big! AS for leaving...I understand. I'm getting ready to be separated from Jose and possibly Maia fro about 5-6 months. I tear up thinking about it :[ The worst part is that we may end up getting married here VERY shortly and so our first year as a married couple will be spent away from each other for half of it.
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