Life Update: February

I posted this on my Facebook status the other day, but I have to post it here. So yesterday, our little family was all playing together. All of a sudden, Kaiden grabbed my pant leg (because that's how he shows me he wants something or wants to take me somewhere) and pulled me over next to E. At first I thought he wanted me to grab him something but when he placed me by my husband, I realized that he simply wanted us sitting next to each other. Both E and I were astonished at what happened. How could a little 15-month old desire something so complex? Does he understand that mommy and daddy belong together and does he long for us to display that love in front of him? He did the same thing again, twice today! This proves that little kids have more than the basic "feed me" "change me" "put me to sleep" needs we think they have. They need both a mother and father. They need attention from both. They need to feel loved and they want to see love displayed. They need more than a care taker. They need more than a sitter. Everytime he does this, it blows my mind and fills me with joy at the same time.

I've been exploring different aspects of photography. I just don't think wedding photography is in the future for me...for a number of reasons. I won't get into that just yet but a big proponent for this change is because we are a military family (aka always relocating) and my business will never take root in one place. I've shared this with a few close friends but haven't made any announcements on my business page/blog because I don't want to make a drastic change just yet. A few days ago I photographed a 5 year old and just yesterday I photographed a newborn. These were two totally different types of shoots, which are both so different from what I've normally been doing. Over these next few weeks I'll be continuing to explore and I'll be praying about the change. We'll see what happens!

Something that has me excited lately is mom-hood. Social media has really brought to light a lot of voices that were never heard before. We now have more access to peoples lives more than ever, and I'm beginning to find out how many Godly, amazing, and creative stay at home moms there are. I never, ever pictured myself as a stay at home mom and so when I made the decision to do so, I felt old-fashioned and outdated. I'm a firm believer that when a woman becomes a mom, her duty is to 1) her husband 32 her kids 3) her home. If she can maintain a job beyond that, awesome! But the first three are exhausting, time-consuming tasks in itself. This is why I struggled with my love for photography so much...it battled with my other roles. That is a resolved, past issue, but I still struggle with feeling alone in the conviction. This is why I'm encouraged by a number of blogs from all sorts of women whose number one desire is to be there for their kids. You can find some of them on the links I love page.

All in all, we are doing great! Lots of change in the future and lots of waiting in the present...

another preview from the 5 year old shoot I did the other day...